How many times have you heard a friend, co-worker, spouse or significant other say, “Think positive” when you are feeling depressed, angry, anxious, frustrated or just down-right negative? Usually it’s the last think you want to hear at the moment, but it could possibly be the best thing you could do for both your emotional and physical health!
Positive attitude, positive thinking, and optimism are now known to be a root cause of many positive life benefits. Studies show positive people can experience an increased life span, lower rates of depression, lower levels of stress, greater resistance to the common cold, better overall well-being, reduced risk of death from cardiovascular disease and better coping skills during times of hardship and stress. In his, A Primer in Positive Psychology, Christopher Petersen, PhD, says, “...optimism has demonstrable benefits, and pessimism has drawbacks.” He goes on to say, “...optimism...has been linked to positive mood and good morale; to perseverance and effective problem solving; to academic, athletic, military, occupational, and political success; to popularity; to good health; and even to long life and freedom from trauma.” It seems people with a positive attitude simply live longer, happier, healthier, more successful lives… and who doesn’t want that!!
Attitude is defined as the mental position that represents an individual's degree of like or dislike for an item – a generally positive or negative view of a person, place, thing, or event. A positive attitude is, therefore, the inclination to generally be in an optimistic, hopeful state of mind. However, attitudes are expected to change as a function of experience – so someone with a typically negative attitude can change!
Overall, people with a positive attitude are optimists and believe they are accountable for good things and that good things will generally come their way. If something bad comes instead, optimists tend to write it off as an isolated incident, an anomaly, or something out of their control. They continue to believe things will be better in the future. A pessimist is a person who nurtures a consistently negative attitude, expecting the worst of people and of situations. This outlook can persist regardless of facts or circumstances that might indicate a more balanced or positive reality.
However, your way of thinking, whether positive or negative, is a habit… and habits can be changed! But it takes practice. If your first thoughts about the meaning of something that has happened are negative thoughts, take the first step toward a positive attitude by simply recognizing your thoughts as negative and trying to create a more positive thought. Thoughts are always under your control and can be changed! The following steps can also help you create a more positive attitude.
Let go of the assumption that the world is against you, or that you were born with a gray cloud over your head. It is an assumption that has no basis in reason or science. The sooner you can attribute your pessimism to a unique set of circumstances rather than the state of the world itself, the easier it'll be to change your perspective.
Understand that the past does not equal the future. Just because you've experienced pain or disappointment in the past does not guarantee that everything else that starts badly will end badly. Do not make a bad start turn into a self fulfilling prophecy for a bad ending.
See yourself as a cause, not an effect. You don't have to be a product or a victim of your circumstances. Stop thinking about what is happening to you and start thinking about what you can make happen. If you're not happy with the way your life is now, set goals and get moving! Use your past negative experiences to build character and make better decisions. Life involves taking many risks every day, and not all of them will end positively. That's what defines risk. But the flip side is that some actions will lead to good results, and it's generally better to have a mixed bag than to have nothing at all. Ideally, the good stuff will outweigh the bad, but you never reach that point unless you put yourself out there.
Use positive affirmations. Write down short statements that remind you of what you're trying to change about the way you see the world. Put them in places where you'll see them every day, such as on your bathroom mirror, the inside of your locker, on your computer monitor, or even taped to your shower wall. Some affirmations to start with are: “Anything is possible.”, “My circumstances do not create me, I create my circumstances.”, “The only thing I can control is my attitude towards life.”, “I always have a choice.”, and “I choose to live the positive side of life.”
Remember that life is short. When you feel pessimism clouding your judgment or you start to feel down about the future, remind yourself that every minute counts, and any time spent brooding guarantees nothing but less time to enjoy whatever life might have to offer. At its core, pessimism is impractical because it causes you to spend time dwelling on things that haven't happened yet and aren't guaranteed to happen, and it prevents you from getting things done. Pessimism breeds indecision. It's a waste of time, and time is a limited resource that you can't afford to take for granted.
Finally, be a balanced optimist. Nobody's suggesting that you become an oblivious Pollyanna, pretending that nothing bad can or ever will happen. Doing so can lead to poor decisions and invites people to take advantage of you. Instead, be a rational optimist who takes the good with the bad, in hopes of the good ultimately outweighing the bad, and with the understanding that being pessimistic about everything accomplishes nothing. Prepare for the worst but hope for the best - the former makes you sensible, and the latter makes you an optimist.
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